Sunday 15 February 2015

Film: 'Fifty Shades of Grey'

So, was it really as dire as some have said? Quite possibly, but with a few, very few, redeeming features.

Cards on the table - I have read the book. Last year. Readable enough, but no great shakes.

First of all, the film stands or falls on the credibility of the relationship between Anastasia (Dakota Johnson) and multi-billionaire Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan). I think that she just about passes muster for believability in the role of a callow, slightly gauche, young woman unexpectedly swept off her feet by Mr Dominator in Seattle, whose immense wealth can't buy him love. I'm afraid that he did not convince me. Statuesque looks, maybe, but even if I didn't find him especially attractive there was barely any glimmer of sexual tension between the two of them that I could detect, though its existence was the whole point of their relationship - he doing the giving, she not only taking but begging for it.

I tried early on to try to dispel the memory of E.L.James' novel and to try to see the film on its own terms, but that was a big ask. For most of the book the Christian character remains something of an unfathomable cipher. Caught up in his emotions yet one has the feeling that a cold, detached intellect is always in resolute control. Here, by putting flesh on the concept of such a man, one sees straight away that he's subject to inner vulnerabilities, so one is always waiting for it all to come crashing down, whereas in the book I was wondering who would take the initiative to end it, if it did come to an end. (There are sequels to the original novel, which I shan't be bothering with - still less so seeing any further films that might come out of them).

And then there are the several S/M scenes- relatively tame by proper S/M standards, unrealistically clinical and as perfectly choreographed as one could wish - if one isn't aware of where to look for the genuine stuff on the internet (or participated in oneself? My own lips are sealed - though they may not have been at the time!) But those scenes were not the sine qua non of this film, although one suspects that many will be wishing that they were. But a major gripe for me, and this being one of my major detestations in any film, is why oh why, whenever two people make love/have sex/whatever, do we have to hear a supposedly smoochy-sounding pop song on the soundtrack? I just cannot flaming abide it! And here it happens not just once but several times! I wanted to retch, and came darned near to doing so. If I hadn't paid for my ticket I would definitely have walked out on its first happening, but I sat in my seat, silently fuming.

The film follows the book quite closely. Some say that it's better than the book. I don't know. Can't really get worked up about either of them.

My oft feeling of tedium was only interrupted on a few instances by the brief appearances of Jennifer Ehle and Marcia Gay Harden as her mother and his step-mother respectively, which lifted my flagging interest sporadically.

Director is Sam Taylor-Wood who made the rather good 'Nowhere Boy' of 2009, the story of the early life of John Lennon. In this film, Dornan's presence aside (whom some may find more acceptable in the role than I did) I can't complain about Ms Taylor-Woods' accomplishment here. Given the material, I think  that on balance she's made a fair enough transfer to the screen.

I'm glad I've seen 'Fifty Shades', if only to have gotten it out of the way. If I hadn't read the book I might not have bothered. So has all the hoo-hah been justified? While declaring a bias in accepting that I'm not such a great admirer of the novel, I'd nevertheless say that it hasn't been............................3/10.


16 comments:

  1. I was hoping you would see it for me.:-)
    The book and the movie sound tedious; this is another one I am sitting out. However, I am often interested in hearing about them. You do a nice job filling that niche.

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    1. Well, I'm pleased that I've done something constructive in seeing it, Dr Spo, if only to save you the time, effort and expense. But from my point of view, as it's opened with such clamorous publicity it would have been a fault if I had missed it. Even if one is a fan of the book I find it difficult to think of anyone raving positively about this film.

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    2. That's more than the film and the book was, Dr Spo, and more's the pity for it.

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  2. Ray,
    Again, thank you for your incisive and fair minded review of "Fifty Shades of Grey." I know about the book but I haven't or will read it. I know the subject, having witnessed the real thing and maybe . . . . well, I'm not saying or confirming anything here. To me this is just another . . . . what is the right word? "acquirement" by the straights of something The Gays (leather and western guys specifically) had in the Seventies (my era). First it was the disco scene, then the bar scene for picking up one night stands then the slow immersion of S & M into the mainstream culture via glossy magazine ads and now even hints of said S & M in mainstream television commercials. So a film arrives with an S & M theme and many are scandalized. My dear (and I don't use the "my dear" term that often if at all), when one has witnessed FF, waters sports where a hunky guy gets in a tub and kneels and a crowd gathers around to indulge said hunky guy in his "water sports" fantasy, and even the dog collar top and bottom thing. I am not scandalized by such a movie as "Fifty Shades of Grey" and especially when there is little or no sexual tension between the two antagonists. We all have our fantasies and some of us are lucky enough to find a partner to help fulfill those fantasies. I find it interesting that the mainstream (mostly straight) culture is just discovering some of the more interesting aspects of human sexuality. Fortunately, for some of us, we know and have experienced the real thing (I'm not telling).
    Thanks again Ray for another incisive and fair minded review.

    Ron

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    1. Ron, in this country at least, it's the women who are making up a higher than usual portion of the audience (so there must be a lot of unimaginative husbands/male partners around!) In fact when I went I noticed only one other man in the audience.

      Do you remember that what 'we' got up to and/or witnessed in those dark rooms, which you refer to quite precisely, was blown open for everyone to know about by the AIDS crisis? At least that's what happened here - and I remember the tabloid press being outraged as they described in lurid detail what f/f was - as well as water sports. All so purposely put-on hypocritical!
      Anyway there's nothing like seeing any of that in this film, though there are certain passing verbal mentions to similar in what she's given the chance to allow her master to do to her. We see absolutely nothing - even the cunnilingus is so delicately and tastefully(!) filmed.
      Having participated in some of the real hard stuff at the far end of the scale, all this is quite tedious. You'd have to have lived a blinkered life to be stimulated by it - which, it seems, many have, particularly the females. If this story had been about two males getting involved in the same kind of relationship it would have been only marginally more interesting. By the way, apart from the guy's naked torso we see hardly anything of the chap's 'equipment', there being just one single less-than-a-second glimpse of the groin end of his shaft. Blink and you'll miss it.
      I think you'd need to have a good reason to want to see this - as I had in having read the book. Otherwise it's hardly an experience to treasure - only just making it into the 'soft porn' category, though it is all VERY soft.

      You can't beat the real thing. And if that's what you're really after why not try the internet? There are some steamy sites in existence that will have your eyes popping out, or so I'm told. Better still, take part in some such 'fun and games' yourself - which, not knowing about you Ron, I'm pretty sure I'll never see those days again. (Sigh!)

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  3. Ray,
    I tried to edit my previous comment but had a problem with the screen jumping around. I don't know what that was all about. I didn't mean to repeat my thanks to you twice, at both the beginning and end of my comment. But then maybe I did because you deserve it for your always intelligent and interesting reviews.
    Ron

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    1. And with your brand new pricey computer too? What can that be all about? But thanks for telling me what you were intending to do as it might not have been obvious.

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    2. Ray,
      My brand new pricey computer is performing fine. It's a shame I can't use it as much because of my injured leg (I'm typing this comment on my iPhone).
      Oh how well I rdmrmbrf the backfield of the clubs. Mostly I observed, once or twice I "reached in" and grabbed s "handful" but being the Romantic Guy that I am, the allure of the backfill quickly wore off for me. Right now us the best time of my life with my sexy Canadian boyfriend. Who would have thought two old guys would have such s great time together? Thus summer will be two years for us and the passion is stronger than ever. Must be the distance and we fon't self each other all the time. All I know is that Pat is the person I was looking for all those years I used roam those darkened bars, dance floors and backrooms.
      Ron

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    3. Ron, Pat seems to have arrived at just the right time for you and I'm so pleased (and insanely jealous!) that it's going so well. Yes, I know that I mustn't give up hope, but the fact is that I'm still waiting for my true 'first', in the sense that we have each other as unique BEST friends, something's that evaded me all my life.
      Anyway, that aside, I think the lure of darkrooms, saunas etc was that you never knew that this might just be the occasion to pick up something really special - which only happened on very rare occasions, but it DID happen enough times to make me never want to stop, at least until I was aware that my own looks were starting to crumble, so that if continued, it would just be embarrassing.
      Pleased that your computer acquisition is being such a success even if you're not able to get fully into it yet. It'll be good when you can get to performing all the tricks with it that of which it's undoubtedly capable.

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    4. Ray,
      Pat did arrive at just the right time for me and, he says, for himself."Soulmate" is an overused word but it applies to both of us perfectly. We are alike in so many ways. We're always amazed when perfect strangers ask us if we're brothers. This has hsppened four times already in four different cities (Lewes, Philadelphia, Toronto, and Lis Angeles). I have never felt as "complete" as I do with Pat. And what is really weird with my attraction to Pat, he is my ultimate physical attraction. I find Pat even more attractive than Hugh Jackman it Ryan Gosling. I'm not a Believer but I now wonder if my prayers have been answered. With Pat in my life I want for nothing. My Search is over. And the best part is that my happiness coned from making Pat happy. I could fir tomorrow content that I have known true love and happiness in my life. Of course I love Bill too but that is a different kind of love. I would never leave Bill. I hope you and everybody gets to experience at least once the joy that I know now. Now if I can just get my leg working again.
      Ron

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    5. What you say moves me almost to tears, Ron - and I DO mean it, without the slightest bitterness. Although I knew it was something special between you and Pat you've really opened up about the depth of your feelings. If you've done it before maybe I hadn't quite believed it. It sounds like your ultimate wish has been fulfilled - although I should know that you'd also like to be in perfect health (and maybe 40 or so years younger? But wouldn't everyone of our generation wish the same?) I can't help wondering if Pat reciprocates your feelings precisely, for his own life.
      Of course I live in hope that I'll know from my own experience what you're going through, though if it ever did happen for me I'd probably collapse in surprise at the unlikeliness of it.
      Now let's get that leg functioning as it should.

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    6. Ray,
      I just got off of FaceTime with Pat. We talk everyday on FaceTime since we first met in August of 2013. We have too. Maybe our rekationship stays so strong because we're not together in person everyday. All I know is that all my adult life I had an ideal man I wanted to meet. All those years I wrnt to bars, placed and answered personal add then, out of the blue this person just happens to see my photo on the Internet then searched for more information about me and finds my blog and contacts me. I didn't think too much about it and then once I cadualky mentioned about getting an "old time photo" if he was ever in the area. Much to my surprise he came down the next week. Ten minutes after I met him I knew my lifelong search had ended. I knew then that dreams really do cone true. And you know what Ray? In my heart I always knew I would eventually meet him. I often told my longtime friend Bob McC. "Something big is going to happen in my life Bob, it's not over yet." I knew it Ray. I didn't know when or how or even what but I knew IT woukd happen and it did. If I should die tomorrow I will without regret or a sense of unfulfilment because I know now my life had been complete. I have known the ultimate happiness. My only wish now us got others to experience that same happiness. There is nothing like that feeling in the world. I am truly blessed. Who knew,? There may really be a God in Heaven.
      Ron

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    7. Oh, Ron. Still so full of superlatives - which I don't think is ever going to change now. But I'm just a little wary of your last sentence. I'm pretty sure it was a throwaway remark, only please don't go all religious on us!

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    8. Ray,
      Don't worry about me going "all religious" on you. I still believe thst when we die that's it, a total void. Nothingness. No bright white light at the end of a tunnel. If I have any fear at all it us that we're reborn (reincarnated) and have to go through all this again. I believe we get one go around and this is it. I've had s good run and I'm ready.
      Ron

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    9. Much relieved to heat that, Ron (about not going religious) but I didn't seriously think you were likely to point in that direction.
      Interesting to hear you say that you're "ready". Good for you. Wish I could say the same. Too many unfulfilled dreams make my life particularly unsatisfactory - but there's still time, at least I hope there is!
      Reincarnation? I don't dismiss it and think it's at least more likely than this heaven/hell palaver but, as you say, it definitely has its downside.

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